Dark Carnival V Prelude

“Goooooood evening ladies and gentlemen!”  Nai began

Sath sighed. He had seen this act a thousand times. Everyone had. He didn’t know why people still came.

“Tonight! Winnie falls of the stage! Beth tells a joke! And Autumn wiggles her boobs!” Nai continued. “But first the news!”

Oh gawd. Thought Sath. Time for the same old Viagra joke….

“This week a criminal mastermind unleashed 500 virtual Viagra onto the grid, police have asked residents to be on the look out for a hardened criminal… HAH!”

It would be so bad if it wasn’t for him laughing at his own jokes… They were terrible! It was like he had lost his Bob Monkhouse big book of jokes and was trying to remember them as he was going senile.

“You think listening is bad, try being his alt” said Reala

Sath looked over quite surprised, “oh hi Reala, long time no carnie”

“I know right. For some unexplainable reason I only ever seem to attack Moons around October or November time” she replied.

They sat in silence dwelling on this for a moment as Nai delivered another age old punchline.

‘The duck looked at me and said my names puddles and don’t even think of asking me what kinda day I have had!’ MUAARGH!”

“So I hear you have taken over the monsters balls at midnight” mentioned Reala

“Yeah, graveyard shift” said Sath. “Its still better than this rubbish though!”

Reala leaned in, ” you know if I had inside help we could take over Moons” she said in conspiratorial tones.

Sath looked at Reala.

“We could even replace the Saturday show with monsters balls”  she said

Sath debated this with himself for a moment on the one hand he would love to see the monsters balls on a Saturday prime time. On the other hand Reala just said monsters balls and didn’t snicker…..

“Alright”  said Sath “I am in!”

“And then then camel said  ‘I dont know, but I got the hump’….  Muuuargh! Get it? Hump? Camel? Muuuargh!”

Sath winced. So whats the plan?

“We turn all the Mooners into monsters, eventually they will only be accepted at the monsters balls” said Reala

It wasn’t much of a plan, and given Realas past failed yearly attempts at taking over the blue moon, he didn’t rate the chances of success very high, but stuff it anything was better than listening to Nais jokes

“And then the Arab said ‘I am sorry sir, a thousand pardons’…. Muaaaargh!”

Sath grimaced and look back to where Reala was sitting to see an empty chair. Its going to be an interesting week he decided